10 Years of Sobriety
April 11, 2008
10 years of sobriety
By Meghann Ackerman
The Times-Georgian
Posted: Tuesday, February 26, 2008 2:07 AM EST
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February 15 is a special day for Audrey Smith. On that day in 1998, Smith decided she was going to stop using drugs. Ten years later she’s still clean and now helps other people fight their addictions to drugs and alcohol.
In 2001, Smith, 50, was hired as the case manager for Carroll County Drug Court, which, like Smith, is celebrating a 10th anniversary this year.
Since the day she was hired, Smith has been dedicated to Drug Court.
“I’ll be here until they burn the building down and then I’ll set up in the parking lot,” she said.
Smith’s job has tested her sobriety. When a client goes back to life of drugs or dies from their addictions, Smith said it’s hard on her. In 2006, her younger brother, Anthony North, died of a heart attack caused by his drug use.
“I’ve lost so many people,” she said. “The fact remains that my brother died and I had to go on. That’s what he’d want.”
During hard times, Smith remembers what she tells many of her clients about sobriety.
“You’re got to want it as bad you want that next hit,” she said.
Smith came from what she called a “healthy” family. When she was young, she and her two brothers traveled around the world because their father was in the Air Force. Eventually the family settled in Carrollton and Smith attended West Georgia College and the Massey School of Business in Atlanta. It was in college that she started using drugs.
“It started during the parties at college,” she said. “I made the choice to use drugs. No one put a gun to my head. Once I got into it, I didn’t know how to stop.”
The advent of crack in the 1980s furthered Smith’s drug use.
“That’s what I fell in love with cocaine,” she said.
Cocaine and crack were Smith’s drugs of choice and early on in her addiction she was able to afford her habit by having well-paying jobs.
“Back in the day, you were called a functional addict,” she said. “Pretty soon that money you make is going downhill.”
Eventually, Smith was no longer a functional addict. She left her children with her mother and was homeless for awhile. She was arrested 23 different times in Carroll County on shoplifting charges. Her parents assumed their daughter was going to die.
“My daddy told me, ‘We had to put insurance on you so we knew we’d have money to bury you,’” she said.
During one of her final appearances in court Superior Court Judge Aubrey Duffey had harsh words for Smith.
“The last time he said, ‘Miss Smith, I’m tired of you going in and out of my stores,’” she said.
On the four counts of shoplifting she was charged with, Smith said three were tried that day and she received a total of 15 years, of which she served 18 months. Although she was sober when she left jail, Smith said she didn’t stick with a treatment program.
Within three months of being free, Smith was using drugs again. On Feb. 15, 1998, she decided to change that and asked for help. The first step to getting better, she realized, was leaving Carroll County.
“Sometimes it takes a geographical change,” she said. “I had to stop speaking to my cousins and stop seeing my uncle and brother. Eventually, if you sit in a barbershop for long enough, you’re going to get a haircut.”
After six months at a treatment facility in Valdosta, Smith was a resident manager. But after a year of sobriety, she had to go back to jail for another count of shoplifting she had not answered for. This time, Smith said she used her 15 months in prison to improve herself by attending Narcotics Anonymous meetings and finding faith.
“This time I went in there and I did it right,” she said. “When I came out, I kept doing it.”
Meanwhile, the same judge who told Smith he was tired of dealing with her shoplifting charges and other members of the community had started Drug Court.
“I was the original Drug Court judge,” said Maryellen Simmons, who is now a public defender. “Judge Duffey wanted to start it and I was assigned as the judge.”
Tracy Wilson, a counselor and founder of the Carroll Meth Awareness Coalition, was the program’s treatment provider and director. She was also the parole board’s counselor and met Smith after she got out of jail the second time.
“I was doing all of the counseling for the parole board. She (Smith) had been running a half-way house she was living in south Georgia,” Wilson said. “She had gotten herself sober and was doing well, but she had to go back and answer for a crime that came up.”
When more funding became available for Drug Court, Wilson said she immediately thought of hiring Smith — who has lived what Drug Court aims to teach — as a case manager.
“It gives us an alternative to incarceration. It gives us an option that saves the county a lot of money. It also gives our citizens who have become addicted a chance to better themselves,” Wilson said.
Simmons said hiring Smith helped recovering addicts because they had someone who understood their troubles and how hard it is to stay sober.
“Being a recovered addict, she could relate to clients in a way Tracy and I couldn’t,” Simmons said. “Because she was going to meetings, she kept up with people. It’s really helpful that she understood what they were going through and what it takes to get them clean.”
Along with staying sober, Smith had to regain the trust of her family and friends.
“When my daughter was 6, I left her with my mom. I missed my son’s graduation because I was in prison. I can’t get that back, but I can be there for them now,” she said. “My grandbabies never saw me in addiction. I’ve got my diamond rings back. I don’t have to pawn them.”
When she’d walk into someone’s house, Smith said they would hide their valuables. Now, she said, she lives with her parents, who can trust her again; her father co-signed on the car she bought four years ago.
Smith said her 40s, her first sober decade, were the best years of her life.
“Today I am somebody. I’m a lady. I’m a woman of God who loves people,” she said. “I’ve been able to take a cruise. That’s something I used to think about when I was high.”
Wilson said Smith’s story is a model for what Drug Court aims to do.
“That is a huge accomplishment,” she said of Smith’s 10 years of sobriety. “She went from being a person who really was a drain on our community to someone who is putting it back together. That’s important: Giving back some of what you’ve taken away.”
In 2003, Susan Bagby took over as the director of Drug Court and immediately saw Smith’s dedication to the program and sobriety.
“She lives this,” Bagby said. “You can feel it exuding from her body how much she believes in recovery.”
Sometimes, though, Smith has to be reminded to slow down. In the past year she had three strokes. But health problems haven’t dampened Smith’s spirit. She laughs at how her life has turned around and credits her years of addiction for being able to help people now. Ten years ago, Smith said, she was looked down upon, but now she counts judges, lawyers and police officers among her friends.
“They believe in me. Now I have people who looked down on me years ago who call me for help,” she said. “Whoever thought a convicted felon would sit at a table with a judge?”
Helping addicts regain their lives is what Drug Court is designed to do.
“We recognized that sending people to prison wasn’t going to solve their problem,” Simmons said.
Participants in Drug Court have a strict set of rules they have to adhere to or they could be facing fines or jail time.
“First and foremost, they need to stay clean,” Bagby said.
Participants also need to have a job, attended regular counseling sessions, earn a GED or high school diploma and submit to regular drug testing.
“Staying busy is conducive to recovery,” Bagby said.
Although Drug Court, which is a two-year program, can have up to 50 participants, Bagby said there are 35 involved this year. Because of how hard recovery can be, some people chose not to participate or end up violating terms of their participation.
“We’re about half and half for successes and failures,” Bagby said. “We’ve had 11 graduates in the part 12 months and from what we know, most of them are doing well.”
In the past ten years, a total of 72 people have successfully completed Drug Court.
